A Softer Kind of Strength
For generations, boys have been handed a very short list of acceptable ways to be male. Never appear weak and above all, never do anything that might be considered feminine.
Useful takeaways from this story.
For generations, boys have been handed a very short list of acceptable ways to be male.
Never appear weak and above all, never do anything that might be considered feminine.
Those rules are beginning to lose their grip, and that is good news for men as well as women.
Building the complete brief
The page is ready to read now. The fuller skim-friendly version will appear here automatically.
The useful part
For generations, boys have been handed a very short list of acceptable ways to be male. Never appear weak and above all, never do anything that might be considered feminine. Those rules are beginning to lose their grip, and that is good news for men as well as women.
How it works
- The phrase "toxic masculinity" is sometimes misunderstood as an accusation that masculinity itself is toxic.
- Courage, independence, physical strength and a willingness to protect others can all be admirable qualities.
- He may ridicule anything feminine, not because he truly dislikes it, but because he is terrified that someone might see a trace of it in him.
What to take from it
He may avoid affectionate friendships because he fears appearing weak.
Details worth keeping
Masculinity becomes toxic when men are told that toughness is the only quality they may possess, that aggression is the only acceptable response to conflict and that tenderness, vulnerability and femininity must be suppressed at any cost. Living under those restrictions can be exhausting. A man may learn to swallow sadness rather than ask for comfort.
Keep reading in the app
Open the app view to save this story, compare related coverage, and continue from the same source.